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  Perfect Writing Forum  Forums  Editing: What's...  Stuck: Sentence Two
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New Post 4/13/2008 9:22 AM
  ggate
3 posts


Stuck: Sentence Two 

The second sentence is the one that sound bad to me.

Artificial intellligence studies have examined the way people think as closely as doctors, psychologists, and philosophers. Most people think that what they do is much like science fiction because of the environement in which the decision processes are completed. As experts in the field agree, however, the environment, whether the supercomputer made by man or the supercomputer called our brains, is becoming less and less relevant to the question of "What is thinking?"

I think the other two sentences can be a little stronger, but it strikes me that they both "hang" on that second one, so fixing it will help me work on the other two.

Thanks in advance!

 
New Post 4/26/2008 9:50 AM
  admin
18 posts


Re: Stuck: Sentence Two 
Modified By admin  on 5/10/2008 11:17:06 AM)

We have our idea about how to fix this (including fixing the spelling error), but let's hear from others first. Hint: think about simplicity and using fewer words to say the same thing.

Anyone?

 
New Post 6/24/2008 3:29 PM
  penner
4 posts


Re: Stuck: Sentence Two 

Maybe it's too late to care, but this might work.

Artificial intelligence seems like science fiction because decisions are being made by computers, not people.

Hope this helps!

 
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